I just woke from a horrible dream. You could call it a nightmare except there weren’t really any horror aspects to it, just a struggle. You see, I was back home driving around town where my old buddies Grant and Will used to live and I had to poop. I first thought about trying my luck with Grant’s parents but for some reason I drove past their house and to my surprise, the garage door to Will’s parents house was wide open. “Great” I thought, “they’ll let me in, and I’ll be out in no time!” I was greeted at the door by Will’s nephew Brody who was still as little as when I last saw him (which must have been 15 years ago). He had no idea who I was but he let me in anyway. The bathroom is basically the closest room to the front door in Will’s house so on my way there I half-heartedly looked around for Corrine and Barry. Will’s parents were not in sight but an older duplicate version of Brody was in the study next to the bathroom. I asked him permission to be polite. He of course had no problem offering me his toilet. So now I’m pooping and this is where the struggle begins (in more ways than one). You see, I thought I had locked the door, or maybe I had but there was this other part of the door not present in Will’s real life house. Little Brody was the first to enter. He had chores to do. While I was on the can trying to pinch one off, he thought it the most important thing in the world to restock the toilet paper. Next someone else came in (by this time I’m not sure about faces anymore, let’s just assume they were Brody clones) and his chore must have been to refill the soap bottles. Really? Your chore of refilling the soap bottles is so urgent that it can’t wait five frickin’ minutes?! I specifically remember him spilling a bunch of soap too. Every time I looked, the door somehow became less locked and more transparent. Next, Corrine greeted me from the magic door that now seemed to only rise about 4 feet from the ground. How polite. “I’m doing fine,” I said, just wanting her to go away so I could get on with my business. Various other kids with chores came and left and even Barry made an appearance in my dream as the shower just had to be fixed that very moment. In the end, I was at least able to finish my unsatisfying dump, squeezing in wipes between chores. As I left my old friend’s house I remember saying to his parents, “next time I’m in the area and have to poop, I’ll try Grant’s parents!” We all had a chuckle. Then I woke up and checked to make sure I hadn’t really pooped.