Squirrel

My dog makes me sick sometimes. Don’t misunderstand me, I love him to death, I just don’t understand how his sense of smell can be hundreds of times superior to that of my own but at the same time apparently has no ability to distinguish good tasting things from absolutely horrible things. Twice Bonham has picked up with is mouth (that gaping cavity where his tongue resides) the rotting dead carcass of a fallen squirrel. When this happens my first reaction is confusion: my dog has something strange coming from his mouth area. Next comes fear: is my dog murdering a helpless animal right in front of me? Will I need to intervene? Then I think,”what if he cripples it? Then I’ll have to help it, watch it die, or put it out of it’s misery.” This thought, however, only lasts a second or two until I realize what my dirty dog’s got in his mouth is a dead freaking squirrel! The third and final emotion is disgust, and it comes over me like a bucket of cold water. I literally screamed at him today when passing through phase three. The thought of a festering nasty dead animal in his mouth almost made me yak. I could have geezed all over the sidewalk. Right now I’ve got a little bile making its way up my throat. I know he’s a dog and his brain isn’t wired the same as mine, but Bonham please, have some decency!!

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